"My promise to my children"

As long as I live – I am your Parent 1st – your Friend 2nd.

I will stalk you, flip out on you, lecture you, drive you insane,

be your worst nightmare & hunt you down like a bloodhound when needed because I LOVE YOU!

When you understand that, I will know you are a responsible adult.

You will NEVER find someone who loves, cares, & worries about you more than I do!

If you don't hate me once in your life – I am not doing my job properly.